Thursday, November 19, 2009

Unschooling Co-op Outing

November and October switched places. It rained and was freezing cold all through October, which was good because we were sick for most of it, so we didn't miss much outdoor time. Now that we're better, the weather is nice. I keep hearing "Indian Summer" here and there, but I don't think it applies because it got so cold and yucky in October and September was maybe mild, but certainly not hot. And besides, I'm pretty sure "Indian Summer" offends me anyway.

Due to the still warm-enough weather, we've been able to do all this nice fall hiking lately. So for our Unschooling Co-op day, I arranged that we'd head out to Squires Castle to check it out, walk in the woods, and drink some hot cocoa. Squire's Castle is what used to be a country estate for a Standard Oil executive. Eventually, his wife died, he built another house in Millionaire's Row in Wickliffe (one of the several varying Millionaire's Rows in Cleveland during the Kerosene Age which moved progressively further from the industrial heart so as to avoid the toxins seeping out from the refineries) and the castle was closed up. One of the area metroparks bought the estate after a time, stripped the interior of the castle, but left the shell so people could go...visit it, I guess. There are three fireplaces remaining and from what I can tell, it's perfectly okay to start fires in them and have yourself a little wiener roast.

The grounds are lovely and there's a hilly forest all around, which is beautiful. The boys and I had never been, so it was high time.From the rear.

Interior shot.

The kids spent some time hanging in the windows.


Then we copped a squat on Donna's recycled wool sweater throw (I need to make one of those, fyi), and enjoyed too "spicy" (according to Bastian) hummus, pretzels, and hot chocolate.
Aleks reminds me of a chocolate joker here.
The kids went on a little walk themselves, then we all went up the hill and into the forest. It was much lovelier, really, than shaker lakes, being not in the middle of a neighborhood where you can hear (and sometimes see) cars driving by on the road. There were steep hills, which the boys dubbed "mountains" and wide, well-kept paths, covered in crunching leaves. Not much in the way of wildlife, but Aleks found some hornet nest pieces for our nature tray.

After hearing a recent tale of accidentally hatching hornets indoors, we were careful to make sure there were no closed cells with hidden life teaming behind the fragile closures.

Exploded tree.
Twisty tree. Reminded me of the growing tree in My Neighbor Totoro. Without its bark, you can see how it grew, in great spirals...





On the drive home, after picking up crickets for Esteban and accidentally squishing Bastian's fingers in the car window (requiring that I pull into a funeral home parking lot), there was a massive sun at sunset, bathing us in an intense orange glow.
Then we stopped into the library to discover that our four canned goods weren't quite enough to wipe all our fines and that I'd read the deadline of the program wrong, thankfully. We also picked up another television program about giant squid (series, actually, about "real" monsters of all sorts) and a couple of books on CD for in the car since Aleks does not appreciate always being forced to listen to the news. Sigh. Then home for minestrone soup!

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Busy Day

After long amounts of writing and thinking on the questions itching at my brain, we
  • headed out to the grocery store,
  • picked up stitched bits of yarn for my upcoming graffiti knitting project from several friends who stitched them(designed to counter the city-sanctioned version running amok all over town, proving our neighborhood cooler and more subversive, as well as saying a big "f you" to whoever cut down my previous attempt)
  • stopped at the library for more books and dvds on giant squid for our upcoming art projects, discovered the "wipe your fines" canned good donation program and stored that for a day or so from now
  • went for a walk in the woods at shaker lakes as the sun went down, encountering but a couple of deer this time



I was struck by this yellow leaf amidst the sea of brown.
Aleks is reading everything these days. We drive down the street and he shouts at me from the back seat, "Mom! Why does that say egg-zit on-ly?" or "Milk! $2.99!" Or reads off names of businesses and signs I don't see and wants me to explain what it means without any sort of context. It's great, because now the reading thing is being taken care of and I can feel far less anxious about it, but it's sometimes difficult when we have to sit and decipher what the heck this tree says while Bastian runs way ahead on the path.
Fuzzy family in low light.
I still don't understand the Shaker Lakes lean-to thing. I'm not sure that I really want to though. If I had it explained, it might take away some of the magic of going on walks and ending up here to FIVE different lean-tos in different places than the previous two or three or one or whathaveyou... Every time we visit, there are new crevices to explore and they're ever-changing and I've no idea who or what changes them or why. We just check them out and sometimes add to them...
The street car going by out on the street.
We worked on the lean-to for about a half an hour before it got too terribly dark to continue hanging out.


After woodsing, we went to Target to buy Natty a birthday present (as it was her actual 23rd birthday) and some canned goods to pay off our library fines. Then we headed home to wrap it up, eat some dinner, and examine our library goods.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

The Usual Crisis of Faith

Several things happened all at once. Or several questions came up, I suppose I should say. One was on the matter of giftedness and its meaning. The next was concerned with the learning of mathematics. The last was about laziness. All of these issues are interconnected in the heart of the unschooling parent, or anarcho-parent, as I am calling myself these days.

Giftedness is but a label, used to distinguish between the varying needs of children/people in institutional environments so as to formulate proper instruction. In the mind of the anarcho idealist/cynic, all that amounts to in the long run is the continued servitude to the system itself. The only reason the labels are necessary is to provide the specialized instruction. With instruction in itself debatable in value, methodology can hardly be determined as appropriate. Right?

Then the matter of learning mathematics and the possibility of never needing them (or at least, higher math) came up. Someone said they felt as though learning higher math was absolutely helpful and necessary so as to understand relevant tasks in life like how to create a budget, create one's own sewing patterns or understand the patterns of others. In this sense, the formal training of higher mathematics was claimed to have empowered one's creativity. Having watched my children build with Lego, K'Nex, and having created my own insane bits of cloth and whatnot without using formal written articulations of geometry, I argued that really the opposite is true: that creativity can empower an understanding of higher mathematics.

I've been handed similar arguments before - that learning basic mathematics and some higher math (algebra, geometry, trigonometry) by rote eventually enables us to understand some of the beauty of advanced mathematics. I thought of an article - which I admittedly never got all the way through - discussing the sorry approach of traditional math education and how it robs us of a deep understanding of the beauty of higher math.

At this point, I lost sight of my argument altogether. Then I read this article illustrating the concept of "by the time you need it, it's too late." And here the crisis set in.

What if we do need to understand how to articulate mathematics? What if I - oh! I mean they of course! - miss the opportunity to discover that naturally (despite Aleks' continued demonstration of his ability to readily understand and use at least basic math concepts)? What if my children count on their fingers or feel ill at ease with numbers or refuse to do their own taxes? What will that mean?

In the midst of this crisis, I confront what I fear is my own laziness - my own desire to do as little as possible, to find easy ways out. I hear other parents comment on the laziness of their children. I see them mentioning fearing the state of their future adult children - the sorry state of their apartments, their inability to finish college or find a spouse. Surely I must be exactly what they fear: the gifted child highly skilled in getting around doing anything nasty or unpleasant, dependent on a man, college dropout...

My husband made a joke the other day about how I'd better not divorce him as I bring so many demands to the table: I don't work (at a paid job), I like sleeping in, I don't cook, and I like to go out a lot. I of course rolled my eyes and said, "yeah, I bring nothing but demands!"

If I take all these simultaneous concerns together and seek out their underlying basis, the question becomes, what is laziness? What constitutes laziness? What do we really need to be doing? What do human children actually, fundamentally require for successful adulthood? What is my definition of my children's success? What the hell am I doing here?

Here is where I struggle to reconcile what I feel to be true, what evidence supports, and the culture that provides my constant context. I struggle even to articulate these matters simply and succinctly. I could babble on for days or weeks - or years if you've ever read my blogs! - trying to determine what this even is, let alone what to do about any of it.

That said, I think that laziness is a perception. That the idea of it comes from a culture of over-work, of under-pay, of implied (forcibly, subversively) scarcity, - a culture where we lock up the food and work people to the bone, devaluing and undermining the invisible labor of raising future workers and creating instead systems that teach but do not nurture, which spend 99% of their effort on maintaining control in a transparent attempt to sustain the institution itself in an everlasting vicious cycle.

I sense this to be true in every turn that I take. The more I learn, the more I loathe the web I feel ever-trapped in. The urge then is to reject it all and run far away. But there's a catch: I am a product of this culture. I cannot divorce myself from this context. I am in some ways merely the sum of my experiences, all of which have been of this culture, this insane capitalist concoction, born of dominance and endless thirst. I too thirst. I am incapable of wholly rejecting every inch of it.

Rejection of everything, too, leaves me directionless and with a confused feeling where I grope around for evidence to support the decisions I make and find little in the way of proof. Therefor I rely on a bizarre, unscientific test: If I lived in the woods, with other people, in a hut, writing cuneiform in the dirt or whathaveyou instead of blogs, what would I and my children need? Not written higher mathematics, in all likelihood.

However, regardless of the need (or lack thereof) of higher mathematics articulated in written form, I still find them somewhat useful in this life; in this context; now. Now is where my children live, unfortunately. Thus my own unscientific test fails me. And my confusion and fear dig deeper.

What to do then? Contrive ways in which we might trick the children into learning higher math? Have faith that Lego and Magformers are enough for now? Or do I do as I usually do and rely on the conversation to lead us there, encouraged onward, no doubt, by my fears and worries pressing in on me in years to come? Is this, then, but finding faith in the constancy of uncertainty?

Monday, November 16, 2009

Working on Counting Down to Christmas

Today I spent far too much time determining what we will do this year for the Christmas Countdown and in which order. I finally narrowed it down from several dozen possibilities, repeating much of what we did last year because it's fun and feels of tradition rather than of stale repetition. We added a few things and took a few things out.
1. Make paper snowflakes and decorate the windows.
2. Visit the A Christmas Story house.
3. Make crystal snowflakes.
4. Pick out a really nice Christmas tree (but don’t squish any elves that may be hiding in the branches!).
5. Decorate the tree and drink hot chocolate.
6. Is the sky clear? Get out the telescope for some star gazing, if not, go for a nighttime walk with homemade lanterns.
7. Write letters to Santa.
8. Make popcorn strands for the tree.
9. Make color ice blocks. Add salt. Build things.
10. Visit Snowdrop's Adventure Game (a local event for kids to play a giant-sized board game about a white deer).
11. Make dough ornaments for the tree.
12. Wear fancy dress for dinnertime.
13. Enjoy a candlelit bubble bath.
14. Listen to holiday music and set up a nature table for the season.
15. Make homemade playdough.
16. Let’s go ice skating today!
17. Have breakfast for dinner.
18. Have breakfast with Santa.
19. Build a Gingerbread house.
20. Bake a batch of Christmas cookies.
21. Buy a gift for a family in need via Heifer International.
22. Visit Baba.
23. Go see the lights at Clifton Mill.
24. Christmas Eve: Unwrap one present after dinner (Mama & Papa get to pick which one).
25. It’s Christmas Day! Enjoy your time with friends and family, food and fun!

I also started list-making for the rest of the holiday season: things to buy, things to make, the thinking up of things to make and buy, and so on and so forth. Already, there seems like not enough time to get everything done. I'm relieved I decided against NaNoWriMo!

See December 2008 archives for last year's complete countdown adventure.

Natty's Birthday Potluck

Both boys were tremendous help getting the house ready to have guests. Together they picked up the house, helped fold & put away laundry, prepared the candle-holders with new tea lights, cleaned the front picture window, emptied the compost, and generally did many, many little tasks of bringing me necessary items or putting things in their proper home.

They also helped put together the two pizzas Natty made. One was butternut squash, bacon, pesto, and mozzarella (store bought from being short on time and long on things to do), and the other was tomato sauce, pesto, fresh mozzarella, and five other cheeses. I didn't actually get to try either, but everyone said they were great. The kids gobbled down most of the cheese pizza themselves, then helped themselves to cookies, strawberry shortcake, and brownies.
All in all, the event was quite the success. Aleks gave Heather & Steve drawings of squid, whales, bears, and zombie wolves, and played Lego with Johnny, Bob, and Steve (all very big boys). Bastian and Aleks also got a lot of tickling and wrestling and turning upside down out.

I enjoyed shmancy shortribs and wine. Yum...

Sunday, November 15, 2009

What Was Actually Accomplished

After the thing that resembled list-making in yesterday's blog post, what we actually accomplished seemed worth detailing. Firstly, I started work on the cooperative mission statement whatnot, which I'm sure all readers are infinitely fascinated by.

I then got as far as to read the Christmas Countdown list from last year and realize I'd already saved it in a Word document last year.

As I was working on both of those things at the computer and after the Tile Guy finished up with our grouting and ceiling patch, Natalie announced she was going to go get kasha at the store. I said, "Oh good!" and handed her the fruit-and-veggie-laden grocery list, which she sighed heavily at. Then Aleks wanted to go with her. Then Bastian wanted to go with her as well, so I decided it best if we all got ready and went to the store together.

At the Food Co-op, we saw our friends India and George and talked happily about the sleepover Aleks & Bastian had at their house last week, as well as about the upcoming changes in the works for the Co-op. Since the co-op didn't have kasha, we decided to go to the Russian grocery.

In the entryway of the store was this poster. It's some theatre event that I can't quite understand.Aleks was wearing his lion costume. Apparently, this is his usual grocery store attire.
I quite liked this weird Troll guy.
Honeycomb in jars. Jon has told me before about getting comb straight out of the fridge at his grandparent's house (they kept bees) when he was a kid. My parents have also kept bits of comb about for chewing on. Aleks was into it. There were bulk Russian chocolates and candy, the children's favorite part by far.

On the way to the Russian store, Natty got a call from our friend of ours that they were going to be playing soccer at a field between the Russian store and our home. So we went for the pick-up game. I called Jon while we were there to get started on the pizza dough so it'd be ready for dinner, even if we didn't get a chance to make our own mozzarella.

Aleks was way into playing with the big kids.
Bastian tried it out a bit too.

Johnny brought the heat. And the crazy.

Natty in action!
Aleks got filthy dirty by attacking people's legs as a defensive mode. I told him he'd go the way of that girl from the University of New Mexico team who got suspended. The other players didn't seem to need to give him a card at all though.
Examining injuries (from wrestling with his brother at home the night before rather than flinging himself at running adults).

It was a beautiful day.
Anna, in between a wedding and a reception, stopped by to play zombie with Bastian a bit.

We taught Bastian how to do somersaults. I consider it a minor failure as a mother for not having ever shown him before!

Afterward, it got so late we totally couldn't finish the pizzas and instead ran about finishing our errands before ordering take-out pizza while Jon and I ate out with our friends over at Slow Learning.

We may not have finished much of our to-do list, but it was a full and lovely day nonetheless.